Updates in the Time of Quarantine

I’m a few days late on the next in my series of essays partly because I was watching both the theatrical and directors’-cut versions of both Alien and Aliens to refresh my memory. I am of the heretical opinion that the theatrical version of both movies is the superior one, an opinion I may discuss at greater length later.

For now, I wish to give a more personal update. The magical girl and I got married three weeks ahead of our original schedule because she’s a nurse, and I wanted to limit her contact with her elderly parents, with whom she was living. That’s why we got married in a private ceremony with the permission of our bishop, and we were just in time, as all public ceremonies of any sort were suspended just a week later.

Anyway, as I assumed would eventually happen, she’s now definitely been exposed to the virus at the hospital where she works, though her own test results aren’t back yet. In any case, if she has it, I definitely have it. We’re quarantining ourselves in our apartment right now while we wait. Nobody in our immediate vicinity, including the patient who tested positive at the hospital, is exhibiting symptoms.

It just so happens that we got this news right as we were beginning our break from work that was originally supposed to be the start of our marriage and honeymoon. That works out well for us: I’m off work anyway, but I’ll be put on administrative leave later if it looks like I need to stay away from my job for longer than our planned vacation.

Admittedly, the two of us are having a much better time than a great many people. While others are getting seriously ill or going stir-crazy, we’re on a little newlywed honeymoon staycation, which both of us are mostly enjoying, even without the slightly larger wedding and honeymoon we originally planned. In any case, the way events have played out have convinced me that I did the right thing to ask the bishop to let us marry early, a request he graciously granted even though it was Lent. I had some doubts at the time, naturally, but now I’m further convinced that was the right move.

Update to Armageddon

As some of you are no doubt aware, I’m planning to get married, and the universe, realizing that my successfully wooing an attractive woman is as impossible and unacceptable as, say, Arthur Dent or Jon Arbuckle doing the same, has taken drastic steps to correct.

So yeah, this whole global pandemic thing is my fault. Sorry about that.

Anyway, the magical girl and I intend to defy the laws of the universe and get married anyway, and we’re now scratching our heads to figure out where, and when, and how.

In the meanwhile, since I caused this disaster in the first place, I think I can present a few ideas of what to do while you’re in quarantine. Stay tuned.